Living with Autobots
by SinisterSalem
Summary: Title says it all! :)
1. Chapter 1

**Rules for Living with Autobots**

**Chapter 1**

**note: I deleted this story not too long ago but now it's redone and revamped and the chapters WILL be longer! Yay! :D **

**So here's the first chappie. This story will be told in my OC Jasper's POV.**

**1. Wheeljack and iPods DON'T mix.**

I accidently left my iPod in the rec room one day.

Wheeljack found it.

He pressed the "play" button.

"Looking for the Perfect Beat" by Afrika Bambaataa blasted at full volume.

Wheeljack freaked out and smashed the iPod.

He still owes me another one.

It's been 2 months.

**2. Don't randomly start a karaoke contest.**

Sideswipe thought it was a good idea at the time.

I went first.

I sung "Rehab" by Amy Winehouse.

Ratchet came in at the part of the song where it says "They're trying to make me go to rehab but I say a no, no , no".

The CMO hauled me off to the Med-bay and called up the local hospital.

The receptionist told him that there wasn't anyone that was supposed to be in the rehab center named Jasper Whitley.

Thank you phone person!

**3. Yo Mama jokes are forbidden.**

I told Sides and Sunny about said jokes.

Two words: BIG MISTAKE.

They both had a yo mama contest.

"Yo mama soooo fat, she was blocking the t.v when she was in the kitchen!"

"Well, yo mama soooo fat that she had to get baptized at Sea World!"

They went back and forth like that for an hour.

Ironhide heard it too.

Oh joy. I wonder what's gonna happen now. (sarcastically)

**4. Sleeping bags are not for hopping around base in.**

Jazz dared me to hop around base in my sleeping bag.

Not FUN!

I kept falling over and landing face first on the ground.

After the fourth time falling, I started whimpering.

Jazz started cracking up when he saw me on the ground.

He also just happened to be filming the entire thing.

I got up and furiously hopped away.

**5. You are not a ghost.**

I went around base one time following random bots around.

"Ooooooo I'm gooooonnnnaaaa coooommee forrr youuuuu tonighttttt!"

(me to Prowl.)

Prowl whipped around and saw me dressed up in a white bed sheet with eyeholes cut out.

He took one look at me and glitched.

I went on to find my next victim.

MHWAAAAAHAAAAA!

**Was it all you thought it was? Was it hilarious or really stupid. Send a review my way and tell me how you thought it was! :D**

**I also want to give a shout out to inkdragon13 for telling me that I should continue with this story. Thanks! :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**Rules for Living with Autobots**

**Chapter 2**

**A/N: **all credit goes to inkdragon13 for #10. Happy Hump Day everyone! Yep, It's only Wednesday. Whoo! I got a chappie done today even with my lack of creativity at the moment! Yay! :D

Also, thanks to all ya'll who faved, followed, and reviewed. I got on here today and saw all of them. Thank you sooooo much. It keeps me writing this wonderful story of epic proportions.

**Disclaimer:**

**Me: **(lays on the floor whining.) Why does today have to be so darn boring? :(

**Wheeljack:** I don't know.

**Me:** Um… do you need any help today? :D

**Wheeljack:** I actually do! You wanna help?

**Me:** Heck yes! (runs off to the lab.) :)

**Wheeljack:** Gakupo the Samurai does not own the Transformers. If she did, we'd be in some deep slag.

**6. No weird websites when Optimus is around.**

I was really bored once.

I went on Google **(on my computer)** and googled "I'm bored"**.**

One of the first results that came up was this one site.**  
**

I visited the site and looked at a bunch of random pics.

Optimus just happened to be hangin' out with me.

He saw an animation of a box of cigarettes turning into a little box robot.

I thought it was really cute.

Then I saw the Decepticon logo.

So did Optimus.

He smashed the computer screen.

I am now currently computerless **AND** iPodless **(still 'Jack?).**

**7. LOLcats is NOT always funny.**

I made the mistake of showing both sets of twins LOL cats.

Skids found one of a cat wearing a medieval helmet with the caption: I MUST CONTINUE MY QUEST TO SLAY THE RED DOT.

The twins and me thought it was really hilarious.

We looked at LOLcats for another hour.

The next day, there was a huge picture of Optimus and Ratchet asleep together on the couch in the rec room one of the walls in the training room.

There was a LOLcat caption with it.

AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCEED, TAKE A NAP AND TRY AGAIN.

Both of them now despise LOLcats.

**8. The bots don't appreciate Charlie the Unicorn.**

"Charlie! We got the amulet! We got the magic amulet sparkle sparkle!**"**

Sam, Sunny, and I were reenacting episode 2.

Sam was Charlie and Sunny and I were the other 2 unicorns.

We made a crown for the Banana King too, but it wasn't Charlie.

It was Ratchet.

Sunny put it on him and we all started shouting "It's the Banana King!".

Ratchet wasn't impressed.

'Nuff said.

**9. Movies no bot should watch:**

**- Angels and Demons** (they don't understand the movie.)

**- Joyful Noise** (too much cussing for Optimus.)

**- Snow White and The Huntsman** (too dark for some bots.)

**-Cars** (don't understand why the cars can talk but not have a bipedal mode.)

**10. Don't give Sam Red bull.**

Sam gets very hyper after drinking Red bull.

One time, he drank 4 cans of it.

He was literally bouncing off the walls and running around the whole base at a speed Blurr would be proud of.

It took me a half hour to find him.

Well, Ratchet did that for me.

The CMO had put a straitjacket on him and Sam was mumbling about unicorns playing poker.

Wonderful.

How was this chapter? I think it came together quite nicely, don't you think?

Send a review my way and tell me how it is. If you thought it was completely horrid, tell me! If it was totally awesome, tell me. Your reviews make my stories **Better.**

**Peace out for today!**

**~Gakupo**


	3. Chapter 3

Rules for Living with Autobots

Chapter 3

**A/N: sorry I haven't updated in a while and sorry for this chapter for being so freaking short. I've been busy with school lately and haven't had the time to write any more chapters. So with further a do, I present to you Chapter 3! Hey, that partially rhymed! Also, I'm introducing a new OC in this chapter. Her name is Harvey and she's Jasper's best friend.**

**11. Harvey is not a force to be reckoned with.**

Leo challenged Harvey to a kick- boxing contest one Saturday morning thinking that he would beat her easily.

I was supposed to get all the bots together in the main hangar.

Once the fight started, Leo got schooled.

Harvey kicked Leo so hard that he flew into a wall.

He never knew that Harvey had been taking kick -boxing lessons since she was 10.

Leo was in the med- bay for** 2 **days.

**12. 52 Card Pickup is too confusing for Autobots.**

I decided to teach a few bots something new.

Harvey found me a deck of cards and a couple Autobots willing to do this.

*snickers*

I pulled out my deck of cards and shuffled them a little.

"So, here's how you play 52 Card Pickup guys,"

I dropped the WHOLE deck on the floor and Harvey and I waited to see if any bots would get the idea.

Red Alert, being the neat freak he is, got down on his hands and knees and picked up every single little card.

The others asked me why I dropped the cards on the floor and why Red Alert had to pick 'em up instead of me.

I explained to Ironhide, Red Alert, Mirage, and Hound that the whole point of the "game" was to drop a deck of cards and make the other person pick them up.


End file.
